Difference between revisions of "Triggers"
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** [https://gyeboost.org/archives/392 Day 21 - “Bittersweet” - Climbing Out of Depression] (based on Tanya) | ** [https://gyeboost.org/archives/392 Day 21 - “Bittersweet” - Climbing Out of Depression] (based on Tanya) | ||
** Day 74 - The Vortex - When One Thing Leads to Another (Dealing with feeling down) | ** Day 74 - The Vortex - When One Thing Leads to Another (Dealing with feeling down) | ||
− | * Battle of the Generation Ch. 40 - Avoiding Triggers | + | * Battle of the Generation Ch. 40-42 - Avoiding Triggers (including speech!) |
== From GYE Members == | == From GYE Members == |
Revision as of 02:05, 2 December 2020
Torah Sources
- העין רואה והלב חומד
- Concept of שור מועד... מועד לשבתות[1] Of course we are human and we can still choose how to react to a trigger. Also, when a change is made to the trigger, the Ox is no longer a מועד.[2]
- יערות דבש דרוש ו - ומתחילה כאשר אמרתי בא יצר הרע להסית לאדם קצת לשם שמים וציד בפיו והוא עץ הדעת טוב ורע והוא שור תם משלם חצי נזק כי חציו טוב והן יפעל אל פעמים ושלש אבל אחר כך אמרו חז"ל (ראה לעיל) הותרה לו ונעשה מועד לאחר נגיחה השלישית ולכך הכל מרומז באות.
- Chehbon Hanefesh, lapin, Ch. 51-52 calls them "גרמא". He explains that in a light case (for example a nazir on his first day of nezirus who sees wine), leaving the trigger can be enough. When the trigger is distant, it can be avoided too (כי הנה הנפש הבהמית אינה רואה אלא בסמוך) because the craving is still weak. But once the trigger is vivid, and it comes suddently, you can get an urge that is stronger than your willpower, then you can only rely on your skills (מלאכת החינוך).
See also
- Flowchart by Charles Duhigg
- Positive Vision - Day 19 - Toxic Environments - External and Internal (the blues can be an internal trigger)
- Day 20 - Choosing Happiness - It’s Up to You - Dealing with depression (various tips).
- Day 21 - “Bittersweet” - Climbing Out of Depression (based on Tanya)
- Day 74 - The Vortex - When One Thing Leads to Another (Dealing with feeling down)
- Battle of the Generation Ch. 40-42 - Avoiding Triggers (including speech!)
From GYE Members
- Ok, last thing: So, what led to me choosing to look at porn and masturbate? A bunch of stuff probably. But here are some that come to mind: Drinking two beers last night, which probably lowered my ability to self-regulate somewhat. Being stressed. That almost always is a precursor to a masturbation and porn session. And on a practical level, being able to access porn quite easily obviously made this possible (although, I've been know to be very creative in the past when it comes to finding content on filtered devices). Another thing was that I sort of missed having the regular GYE boost on Friday. It wasn't really practical for me to print out the shabbos pages they posted. I honestly think that made a difference. So, what will I do differently? I guess I can commit to no more than one beer at night (if I'm drinking). Also, going to make sure to find time on Friday to read the shabbos GYE newsletter. Honestly, though, just here to try and do my best with this, trying to learn something along the way. #Ihavestrength
- I get stronger urges at the end of the day for sure. Some of it is being tired. I think some of it comes from feeling like, crap, I'm going to need to do the same crap tommorow, basically not being super excited about the next day. It actually makes lessens those feelings once I realized that. #Ihavestrength
- ↑ בבא קמא לז, א - במשנה: שור שהוא מועד למינו ואינו מועד לשאינו מינו, מועד לאדם ואינו מועד לבהמה, מועד לקטנים ואינו מועד לגדולים, את שהוא מועד לו - משלם נזק שלם, ואת שאינו מועד לו - משלם חצי נזק. אמרו לפני רבי יהודה: ה"ז מועד לשבתות ואינו מועד לחול? אמר להם: לשבתות - משלם נזק שלם, לימות החול - משלם חצי נזק. אימתי הוא תם? משיחזור בו ג' ימי שבתות.
- ↑ Video: OXEN & TESHUVAH What can we learn about Teshuvah from the Halachos of Tam and Mu'ad (goring oxen)? (The Lubavitcher Rebbe, just like one change can be make a Muad into a Tam, so too with one change, we can become a tzaddik gamur.)