Early Warning System

References

• Develop an early warning habit. Learn to recognize the urge when it first comes calling. Discover your earliest red flag signals. Don’t be caught off guard. Nipping temptation in the bud is easier than stopping it when it’s got a full head of steam. SMART Recovery, the "Awareness" part of the DISARM Method.
• Let’s be real, in times when we are losing our grip we are usually not thinking straight. It will make a world of difference if you just take a second and find your footing. Granted, this is easier said than done. Urges can make us feel desperate and frantic. But when our brain kicks into high gear, we need to put the breaks on and look at what is happening. You might not be able to catch yourself right away, but with practice you’ll start to see triggers and stresses coming. Eventually, you’ll be ready and waiting to shut down these urges before they even become an issue. Fortify
• Stop, get away and redirect attention (including from sexual excitement): Stop what you are doing and admit you are in a danger zone. As soon as the thought crosses your mind that you are doing something that could make you susceptible to becoming actively involved with porn again, you need to stop. If you dismiss or rationalize away warning signs of danger, you set yourself up to plunge further down into the Relapse Zone. On the other hand, validating your awareness of being in vulnerable territory and choosing to immediately disengage from your porn-oriented thinking and behavior helps you to break out of the trance-like state that often accompanies a relapse. Stopping is a way of giving yourself an opportunity to acknowledge that what you are doing is dangerous and will lead to problems. Maltz, Wendy.

From GYE Members

Nip it in the bud

• תניא ליקוטי אמרים פרק יב: מיד בעלייתו לשם דוחהו בשתי ידים ומסיח דעתו מיד שנזכר שהוא הרהור רע ואינו מקבלו ברצון
• ראה בזה בוהאר עיננו עמ' עט-פ ע"פ קונ' ושמרו דרך ה' עמ' כג עיי"ש.

#wilnevergiveup: Someone wrote "it feels like I am turning in the whirlpool of a toilet being flushed, you know where you are going to end up and there is little to do to stop it." When this happens, I need to grab onto something before it's too late. The hard part is that when we are turning in the toilet it's very hard to stop and think. I don't really have a good strategy for this and in the passed when I ended up this far I haven't been able to climb out. I guess the trick is not to end up here. The main idea here is to nip it as early as you can. We all fall into the trap of "if I give in a little, it will leave me alone for a while". I don't really know why after all this time we still fall for it...  I don't know anyone who fell who didn't first give in a little. On the other hand, anyone who succeeds does so by saying no.