Girlfriends

STUB

I often tell bochurim regarding relationships with the opposite gender, that every experience you have with a girl before marriage, (and it is highly unlikely you will marry this girl), takes away from the specialness of your future, and hopefully decades long relationship with your wife. Your wife no longer becomes the first girl (outside of your immediate family), you had a warm and loving conversation with, laughed with, or experienced any level of intimacy with. She is now the second, or third, etc. This doesn’t mean that your marriage will necessarily fail, but it does mean necessarily, that the exclusivity and specialness of that relationship has been reduced.

There are many other points to consider on the topic of girlfriends (search online for “Avi Landa Girls and Girlfriends” for an audio presentation on the topic) but let’s stay focused on masturbation.

(from Maintaining Kedusha)