Bookending Difficult Events - Revision history

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“BOOKENDING” DIFFICULT EVENTS: Sometimes sex addicts are triggered unexpectedly. Other times, triggers can be anticipated long in advance. For instance, attending a social engagement where people will be looking their best and drinking alcohol is an obvious potential trigger for most sex addicts. Knowing this, addicts can arrange to “bookend” such an event with phone calls to their therapist, twelve-step sponsor, accountability partner, and/or another supportive person in recovery. During the “before” call, an addict commits to sobriety, and he or she may even discuss plans to avoid relapse in this particular situation. The “after” call provides an opportunity to discuss what happened, what feelings came up, and what the addict might need to do differently next time. (The practice of bookending also helps with the “lonely” portion of HALT.)

''Weiss, Robert. Sex Addiction 101 (p. 211). Health Communications, Inc.. Kindle Edition.''

← Older revision		Revision as of 08:52, 25 December 2020
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	* “BOOKENDING” DIFFICULT EVENTS: Sometimes sex addicts are triggered unexpectedly. Other times, triggers can be anticipated long in advance. For instance, attending a social engagement where people will be looking their best and drinking alcohol is an obvious potential trigger for most sex addicts. Knowing this, addicts can arrange to “bookend” such an event with phone calls to their therapist, twelve-step sponsor, accountability partner, and/or another supportive person in recovery. During the “before” call, an addict commits to sobriety, and he or she may even discuss plans to avoid relapse in this particular situation. The “after” call provides an opportunity to discuss what happened, what feelings came up, and what the addict might need to do differently next time. (The practice of bookending also helps with the “lonely” portion of HALT.)<ref>''Weiss, Robert. Sex Addiction 101 (p. 211). Health Communications, Inc.. Kindle Edition.''</ref>		* “BOOKENDING” DIFFICULT EVENTS: Sometimes sex addicts are triggered unexpectedly. Other times, triggers can be anticipated long in advance. For instance, attending a social engagement where people will be looking their best and drinking alcohol is an obvious potential trigger for most sex addicts. Knowing this, addicts can arrange to “bookend” such an event with phone calls to their therapist, twelve-step sponsor, accountability partner, and/or another supportive person in recovery. During the “before” call, an addict commits to sobriety, and he or she may even discuss plans to avoid relapse in this particular situation. The “after” call provides an opportunity to discuss what happened, what feelings came up, and what the addict might need to do differently next time. (The practice of bookending also helps with the “lonely” portion of HALT.)<ref>''Weiss, Robert. Sex Addiction 101 (p. 211). Health Communications, Inc.. Kindle Edition.''</ref>
		+
		+	== Summary by @Howard ==
		+	'''Bookending difficult events'''
		+
		+	One way of using support for accountability, increased awareness and focus when trying to manage challenging situations is to bookend such events with calls and reports to other supportive individuals; either support group members or professionals.
		+
		+	'''How it works'''
		+
		+	You are going to attend an event where there are likely to be some triggers (like attractively dressed women in party mood) and variables associated with temptation (like lots of alcohol).In this circumstance by bookend this event with communication (calls or texts) with a reliable support person. The first call would take place prior to the event, and would explore your concerns, different strategies and a decision as to what specific tactics you will use to handle the situation.
		+
		+	Following the event, you would contact the same person and tell them what actually happened at the event, explaining the challenges, whether they matched your expectations (and fears) and how well you were able to cope.
		+
		+	The advantages of this approach include…
		+
		+	Greater accountability. Having to share these strategies and events with a supportive person makes it more likely that your report and perception will be more focused, as well as timely.
		+
		+	Having to focus on the reality of what happened in real time. There’s the chance, if not the likelihood, if this shared analysis was delayed a day or more, it would likely be distorted, or not seem as real.
		+
		+	As we have seen, realistic analysis of temptations, strategies and performance are critical to effectively controlling your habits.

	== From GYE Members ==		== From GYE Members ==

← Older revision		Revision as of 12:12, 16 December 2020
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	[[Category:Triggers]]		[[Category:Triggers]]
	[[Category:Social Support]]		[[Category:Social Support]]
		+	<references />
		+	[[Category:Urge Management Strategies]]

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 * One basic strategy of bookending as a 12-step recovery tool involves making contact with a fellow recoverer both before and after a possibly triggering event. It might mean, for instance, calling or texting someone before and after (see the bookend?) a potentially risky situation, to insure that no relapse is likely to occur.<ref>https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-distracted-couple/201402/bookending-in-adhd</ref>
 * “BOOKENDING” DIFFICULT EVENTS: Sometimes sex addicts are triggered unexpectedly. Other times, triggers can be anticipated long in advance. For instance, attending a social engagement where people will be looking their best and drinking alcohol is an obvious potential trigger for most sex addicts. Knowing this, addicts can arrange to “bookend” such an event with phone calls to their therapist, twelve-step sponsor, accountability partner, and/or another supportive person in recovery. During the “before” call, an addict commits to sobriety, and he or she may even discuss plans to avoid relapse in this particular situation. The “after” call provides an opportunity to discuss what happened, what feelings came up, and what the addict might need to do differently next time. (The practice of bookending also helps with the “lonely” portion of HALT.)<ref>''Weiss, Robert. Sex Addiction 101 (p. 211). Health Communications, Inc.. Kindle Edition.''</ref>
 [[Category:Triggers]]
 [[Category:Social Support]]

← Older revision		Revision as of 15:30, 26 November 2020
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−	~~“BOOKENDING” DIFFICULT EVENTS: Sometimes sex addicts are triggered unexpectedly. Other times, triggers can be anticipated long in advance. For instance, attending~~ a social engagement where people will be looking their best and drinking alcohol is an obvious potential trigger for most sex addicts. Knowing this, addicts can arrange to “bookend” such an event with phone calls to their therapist, twelve-step ~~sponsor, accountability partner, and/or another supportive person in~~ recovery. During the “before” call, an addict commits to sobriety, and he or she may even discuss plans to avoid relapse in this particular situation. The “after” call provides an opportunity to discuss what happened, what feelings came up, and what the addict might need to do differently next time. (The practice of bookending also helps with the “lonely” portion of HALT.)	+	''Bookending is a 12-step recovery tool.''

−	''Weiss, Robert. Sex Addiction 101 (p. 211). Health Communications, Inc.. Kindle Edition.''	+	* One basic strategy of bookending as a 12-step recovery tool involves making contact with a fellow recoverer both before and after a possibly triggering event. It might mean, for instance, calling or texting someone before and after (see the bookend?) a potentially risky situation, to insure that no relapse is likely to occur.<ref>https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-distracted-couple/201402/bookending-in-adhd</ref>
		+
		+	* “BOOKENDING” DIFFICULT EVENTS: Sometimes sex addicts are triggered unexpectedly. Other times, triggers can be anticipated long in advance. For instance, attending a social engagement where people will be looking their best and drinking alcohol is an obvious potential trigger for most sex addicts. Knowing this, addicts can arrange to “bookend” such an event with phone calls to their therapist, twelve-step sponsor, accountability partner, and/or another supportive person in recovery. During the “before” call, an addict commits to sobriety, and he or she may even discuss plans to avoid relapse in this particular situation. The “after” call provides an opportunity to discuss what happened, what feelings came up, and what the addict might need to do differently next time. (The practice of bookending also helps with the “lonely” portion of HALT.)<ref>''Weiss, Robert. Sex Addiction 101 (p. 211). Health Communications, Inc.. Kindle Edition.''</ref>
		+
		+	[[Category:Triggers]]
		+	[[Category:Social Support]]