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From GYE members
When I was a struggling bochur I was definately living a double life - spending large portions of the day learning in bais medrash then going to the dorm/dirah or wherever and acting out. As for tricking people - when speaking to parents and they would ask me how the learning is going I felt pretty rotten saying "great BH" , when in reality it was terrible because my mind was full of tumah and I was all "depressed". I knew the right way to have a relationship with myself and with Hashem ( probably the 2 most important relationships someone could have) but I abused it by taking so much potential and oppertunity and squandering it for a fleeting second of false pleasure. #i-man